Consistency

I have really been struggling with consistency for a very long time. This has leaked out into all areas of my life. I may do really good at something for 1 day or a few days in a row. Then for one reason or another I drop the ball then the next thing you know time flies by and the original task is no longer even on my radar. It is almost as gradual as the change in our children as they grow. So subtle that you barely even notice a change at all. Then the next thing you know you wake up on a Monday morning and none of their clothes fit. You look at an older picture and you see that all of their baby chub has suddenly disappeared from their cheeks.

Time is such an abstract concept, where we all have the same amount of hours yet are constantly feeling like we do not have enough time. I am tired of feeling like everyday is rushed only to come to the end of it and having not achieved the things I really needed to get done. When reflecting back on this, it can be an overwhelming feeling. The reality is when we have this defeated attitude it doesn’t make it easier to have a more productive day tomorrow. I strongly urge you to take your tasks a bite at a time, with flexibility for yourself. I find when I allow myself the flexibility I am not nearly as devastated if a task does need to be moved to the next day. I also have discovered that routine, and consistency make a large difference. For example if you deep clean weekly then it is very simple to do. But if you just deep clean when you feel like it the task seems almost insurmountable.

I am going to be completely vulnerable here for a moment. Personally I have struggled with my salah (prayer) for a long time. As a Muslim we are obligated to pray 5 times a day. These prayers are at appointed times. It keeps us centered and focused on Allah through out out day. Obligation, is such a heavy word but this is one of the pillars of Islam. Their is heavy importance on this, due to the fact that there is so many benefits for us if we perform our salah regularly. As I spoke about in a previous post I am a struggling perfectionist and with this I really have a hard time committing to tasks that I cannot fulfill perfectly. Over time of missing one salah, or a few salah here and there turns into days, weeks, and eventually months. I have decided that enough is enough and that something needs to change. So I have committed to working on my salah no matter what it takes. I had a whole conversation about this, and my plan is pray each and every salah. I will not clear the notification off of my phone until I go and pray it. Due to Covid the majority of my time is spent inside of the house. So their really is no excuse to miss a salah. Allah places so much more barakah in our time if we actually perform our salah. So I have decided that this is going to be something I am working on over the next week. I am going to pray each and every salah, and if I miss one I am going to pray the salah together to ensure that I pray each an everyone. I have committed to this so I am writing it here to hold myself accountable.

Part of me has felt so guilty doing what I know is right because I have messed up so many times. It feels like how can I come to Allah when I am making so many mistakes. I heard this podcast the other day though, where she was talking about that Allah already knows weather I come to him or not. So me avoiding him doesn’t keep him from the knowledge of the things I have done. Also Allah is the most merciful so why I am I fearful that he cannot forgive. Allah is ready and willing to forgive us, he just wants us to come to him and ask for his forgiveness.

I can only imagine how this step I am taking in committing to working on my salah will have as an impact on my life. I wanted to bring this topic up to all of you because I know if I am struggling with this so many more are likely struggling with the same thing. Please know that you are worthy of Allah’s forgiveness. He is ever merciful and forgiving of all of us. The only time it is too late is when we refuse to come to him and we run out of time. Remember that none of us know when your time to leave this Earth will come. So please do not wait to take these steps. Lets take it one day at a time, even smaller one prayer at a time. If you have messed up before this moment start from the very next prayer to stop what you are doing go make wudu and make your salah. I encourage you to take the steps to start doing good and correcting your affairs before it is too late. Remember good removes evil, each moment is an opportunity to do good. So take this moment to make a positive change. None of us are too far gone, Allah is willing and ready for us to come to him. Until next time Assalamu Alaikum (may peace be upon you).